Everyone wants it their way, especially you

You have been trying to persuade people since you were a baby. Crying, smiling, banging your hands on the table. Primitive to be sure, but effective. Remember the aisle of the grocery store with your mum? Begging for that candy bar? That was persuasion. Boys, remember high school dating? That was persuasion. But it seems that after you got your business cards printed, some of the tenacity associated with your early persuasion skills (and persistence skills) is missing. Fear not. The persuasion answers you?re looking for, whether it?s sales, service, internal communications, friends, or family, are about to be revealed. The skill of persuasion is getting others to see your perspective, agree with your ideas, do what you want them to do, or just simply agree with you. It?s a science and an art. Persuasion is not just a selling skill. Persuasion is a life skill. The key to persuasion is to let the other person feel great after he or she has decided to see it or do it your way. In order to accomplish this, there has to be an understanding of ?how? to best persuade. Here are the elements that go into your ability to persuade others. No one single element will complete the process. The more you master each of them, the more persuasive you?ll become. 1. Explaining what, why, and how. Something everyone wants to know. People start out skeptical. They want to know things like: Why will this work? Why do you want me to do this? Why are you asking me? What are you trying to accomplish? What will this mean to me? How will this affect me? How do I win? Your ability to plausibly explain goes a long way towards persuasion. 2. Explaining what?s in it for them. People are more likely to be persuaded if they see how they win as a result of following your lead, or seeing it your way. 3. Your sincerity. Your conviction is part of their buy-in. False sincerity eventually shows; and smells. 4. Your believability. Are you making statements that others can relate to? That others find conceivable? Conceivable leads to believable. 5. Your questioning skills. This is a major key to persuasion. Not telling, asking. Are you asking questions that relate to the other person? The easiest persuasion answer is: get the other person to persuade themselves. This is done by asking questions. Question about them, that makes them stop and think, and respond in terms of you. Powerful persuasion starts with powerful questions. 6. Your communication skills. How would you rate your communication skills? Have you ever seen yourself present on video? Until you do, you have no idea how good you are, or are not. 7. Your visionary (storytelling) skills. Can you paint the picture so clearly they can see the rain and feel the sunshine? Facts and figures are forgotten, stories are retold. 8. Your reputation. Reputation so powerful it can make persuasion an automatic yes if yours is exceptional, or an automatic no, if yours is iffy. 8.5 Your history of success. Somehow, the more you have won in the past not only dictates your present demeanor, it dictates your persuadee?s demeanour towards you. If you have been a winner, you can project winning. This becomes evident, and transferable, as you seek to persuade others. Persuasion is an outcome. The secret of persuasions happy outcome is two words: manipulation free. Manipulated persuasion is short lived. True persuasion exists when it lasts beyond the moment. Am I persuading you yet? What better way to learn persuasion than to see yourself being persuaded, taking action as a result of it, and loving it. Why not learn more ways of getting others to see it your way? If you agree with me so far, I have done my job as ?persuader?. ?I Did It My Way!? is not the way that song should have ended. If Frank or Elvis were masters of persuasion, they would have sung: ?I did it my way, and everyone agreed with me.? Want the long list of persuasion benefits? Go to ? register if you?re a first time user ? and enter PERSUASION in the GitBit box. Jeffrey Gitomer, author of The Sales Bible, and The Little Red Book of Selling. President of Charlotte-based Buy Gitomer, he gives seminars, runs annual sales meetings, and conducts internet training programs on selling and customer service at He can be reached at 704/333-1112 or e-mail to

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